Animal Farm Creative Project

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Poetry Out Loud

I chose the poem "Under the Vulture-tree" by David Bottoms. I really feel strongly about this poem and really can connect with it. I have always been a really strong beleiver in the less liked, more misunderstood animals. Vultures are an animal that people are naturally frightened of and just don't tend to like. I know they are doing the enviroment a favor by eating dead animals. Like the last line says, "with mercy enough to consume us all and give us wings", by consuming us when we die, the vultures let us give our nutrients back to the earth.

I hope to try and make the poem show that the vultures aren't animals to be disliked or feared. Although the author uses adjectives to describe the vultures like "wrinked, fleshy, raw" he is trying to convey that true beauty lies within the intensions of them. It can also conect to humans. Many people draw conclusions of a person based on physical impressions. They don't try to see what the person is really like and see how they can be a really nice person on the inside with the best of intensions. I will use my voice in a way that turns those ugly adjectives into a way that will make people think about how the author chose those words specificaly. Maybe people will think of the misunderstood in a different way.

Alena

Urgent Extra Credit Blog- 5 Part Paragraph Skills

Although I didn't read over my other 5 part paragraph blog before I made my new one tonight, I realize that I did try to make sure that the skills I was weaker in before were better this time. I think I did a much better job this time on making my commentary not so plot summaryish. My other paragraph could be border line at some points. Also, my commentary specifically supports the thesis. Everything I wrote relates back to the main point I was trying to prove in the topic sentence. On my other paragraph, I had a solid thesis, but not all my concrete details directly supported it. What really helped me see how I needed to improve on this was critiquing so many of the 5 part paragraphs in class. All that class time wasn't wasted; it really did help improve my writing.

Alena

Poetry Out Loud

 Part 1: Website Cruising

1. "A Boat beneath a Sunny  Sky" by Lewis Carroll
2. "Coda" by Basil Bunting
3. "I heard a Fly buzz- when I died" by Emily Dickinson
4. "Under the Vulture-tree" by David Bottoms
   "The Arrow and the Song" by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Part 2: What I Think

I liked "The Arrow and the Song" and "Under the Vulture-tree" the best because I could connect to them the most. I really like archery and I am an ambitious birder. When I have to recite a poem, if I don't like them, I can't motivate myself to remember it. Formerly, I had memorized "Mushrooms" and another poem about owls. Because I like these poems, I never had to kick myself to learn them. Rather on the contrary, I enjoyed reading and rereading them in order to memorize them. "The Arrow and the Song" and "Under the Vulture-tree" are the most interesting to me so it will be not difficult to motivate myself to memorize them.

I did not like the other three as much. Either they just weren't interesting to me personally or couldn't connect with them. "A Boat beneath a Sunny Sky" is about remembering a beautiful world that you are no longer a part of. Fortunately, I have never had that experience and can therefore not connect with the meaning of the poem.

Of the two I like the best, I will pick "Under the Vulture-tree" because "The Arrow and the Song" is much shorter and I am not so confident in my poem reciting abilities to score top points with a very simple and short poem. They both are excellent poems that I like very much but I will peruse and further analyze "Under the Vulture-tree".

I knew when I read the poem that I could connect with it. Since I was very young I have been a supporter of misjudged animals. My sixth birthday party was spider themed; I have never had a princess party. When I was three my ideal future career was that of a shark scientist. I disliked ponies and dolphines because they were the "good" and "nice" animals. I loved bugs too. "Creepy crawlies" were my garden friends. But when I read this poem for the first time I thought of fifth grade. Another fifth grade teacher had a non-bullying poster. It was a vulture with a huge red "X" across it. When I asked her what this meant she said it was because vultures pick on animals. They do pick on animals, but literaly, not symbolically like she was portraying it. The eat dead animals. Dead animals. Animals left uneaten by vultures would attract other animals to it. The majestic bald eagle, our national bird is a carrion eater. They would rather scavenge for rotting flesh than fish for their food, yet no one thinks of them as bullys. Vultures do the enviroment a favor, actually. Some animals, left uneaten will start to bring desease. Magotts and flies fester on decaying flesh. This is dangerous for animals that eat the carrion later. Another reason vultures are disliked in society is their unapealing apreance. Ugly, vicious, disgusting birds, right? Nope. Their bald heads and long necks help keep the bird clean as it eats the meat inside. Also they are known to fly long distences after every meal to find water to cleanse themselves. They are surprisingly clean creatures. And vicious? They don't kill animals- ever. They weren't made for it. As you can probably tell I have alot to say in vulture's defense. The same can be said about spiders, sharks, owls, and other very misunderdstood and misjudged animals. The last line of the poem, "...with mercy enough to consume us all and give us wings" shows how the vultures do help the enviroment. My favorite nickname for them has always been "nature's recyclers". Because that's what they do; return the dead's nutrients to the earth.

Part 3: Scoring Criteria

Conveying the meaning of the poem to the audiance will be easy, since I have such a strong opinion about it. Also, my physical articulation is pretty decent and my voice is clear and easily heard. I don't whimper. So I don't think I will have to work very hard to make sure I meaningfully portray the poem's themes and articulate them well.

I can prepare well for recitations, but calming myself before a preformance may pose a challenge. I get nervous and speed up, which can lead to mispronounciations. The worst thing about getting nervous for me is saying something, then immediately forgetting what you just said and having no idea what to say next. This is particularly frustrating during presentations and preformances. The second criteria that will be hard is the dramatic appropriatness. I am not very good at making sure I use my hands to enhance what I am saying. But by being nervous that I am not acomplished at this, I may overuse dramatic appeances and make the poem seem insincere.

Part 4: Videos

Jackson Hille recites "Forgetfulness" in a very entertaining way. This makes the preformance successfull in the way that it is never boring or make you wonder what in the world he is talking about. Plus, it's a topic we can all relate to; we all forget things. This makes the poem easy to understand in a very interesting way to the audience.

Madison Nieemeyer recites "I Am Waiting".  This is a repetive, long poem that could become quickely boring. The way she tells it, however, is not boring though it is repetive and lengthy. Her vocal nuances and enunciations are perfect for the slight urgency of the poem. Also the way she uses her body language enhances the meaning without taking away from the poem or is distracting.

Part 5: Summary

I think this competition will be a great challenge. I love to read and recite poetry, but it is done so unnaturally that it makes you work hard. I have my heart set on winning, but I realize my competition will be feirce. Reciting poetry like the people in the videos do really exposes you; it would be so much easier to just say a memorized poem instead to reciting it in a meaningful way. But it's a risk I am going to take to get to the school competition.

Most Important English Concept

It has seemed like the first quarter of the school year just flew by. A whole sixtenth of my high school career is finished. But what I know I will never be finished doing is correcting other people's writing. By far the most important skill I have leaned this year is how to properly analyze and critique my peers' works. No matter what job you have, whether you choose to be an engineer, biologist, or be invloved with technology, you will have to know how to write properly and find errors in other people's writing too. Biologists have to write scientific reports. Technical writing is very straightforward and knowing how to analyze writing for theme will not be usefull in your career. There are many things we learn in English that specifically apply to English. They don't benefit us abroad. The majority, however, can teach us to better our lives in whatever field of occupation we choose. Learning how to correctly criticize our peers falls in this catagory.

We spent numerous weeks on critiquing paragraphs, and we spent so much time on this particular skill because it is so valuable to learn. Working on helping our classmates write better paragraphs helps us write better paragraphs oueselves. Often times we are are reluctant to criticize our own work; not wanting to admit that we have our own skills that we have to work on. Realizing what others need to improve upon helps us see it in our own writing. Therefore we become better writers with skills that we can apply to many aspects of our lives.
Alena

Lobsters

Some very interesting ideas were brought up in the "Lobsters" discusion. One particular idea that really caught my attension was the comment about the colors. Most people agreed that the adjectives used to decribe the lobster's colors (mud, bruise, cadavar) were purposefuly chosen to create a mood of death. One person disagreed and said that the adjectives picked were not connected to a deeper meaning and happened to be the shades of color the author wanted to describe. The specific hues were just supposed to bring up a color in your mind; not help to create the tone or have connotation.

I certainly beleive that they were very carefully and artfully chosen to enhance the meaning of the poem. Every single word in a poem is picked extremely specifically. The three adjectives used to descibe the colors were no accident. Neither was the word choice of "herd", which was used multiple times. To me, when I hear the word "herd" I think of the Holocaust. "Herds" of people rounded up to strip and die in a gas chamber. How different is that than of "herds" of lobsters in a glass tank displayed for the pickings and an inhumane death? Not very. The tone the author created with the specific diction is very similar to that of the Holocaust. Mud, bruise, cadavar, herds. Even reading the words without context is depressing if not gloomy at the very least.

And on that happy note,
Alena

Paragraph Writing Skills

Some mistakes were made again and again in the paragraphs. Point transitions were not seperate sentences than the sentences that embedded the quotes. Also, there was qiute a bit of plot summary before the concrete details. But I did think it was helpfull to me as a writer to critique other people's writing because it is easier to see what could have more work done when you yourself did not write it. To write a good paper you have to accept the things you don't do well and try to improve it rather than ignore it.

I know I have to make my concrete details fit better and support my thesis more strongly. I can usually make a pretty good thesis, but I have some trouble finding examples that really back up the point I am trying to make. Also, I need to work on making my commentary more of my own ideas and thoughts because some of it was borderlining plot summary. I will try to improve in these places and make my next 5 part paragraph better.

Alena